April 27, 2009

happiest place on earth

I spend a lot of time trying to discover who Ben is as a little boy. I don't want to label him. Or put him in some box or category: spirited, angel, social, emotional, etc. I don't like it when people do this to me, as a some what confident, self assured 30+ year old, I can only imagine how frustrating this would be for a two year old. Who doesn't know who he is or who he wants to be. And his options are limitless. But in an effort to be sensitive to his little soul, I am constantly making note of what makes him happy, what could upset him, when he gets excited, when he gets frustrated, etc. Basically so that I'm not torturing him unknowingly as we go about our days. All this coupled with my neurotic tendencies that I try not to project on him (fear of abandonment, anxiety with new places / situations, need for alone time, etc). I try to be so sensitive anytime Ben will be in a new situation, or new place with new people, that could overwhelm him. Especially if I am not going to be there. But he always seems to thrive in these (scary!) new situations. Loves meeting new people. Loves new surroundings.

So why should I have been at all surprised that my sweet Ben looked like this for 5 hours (right through nap time) at Disneyland on Friday? Aparently not overwhelmed AT ALL by the masses of people, crazy characters, dark rides, and loud noises! He literally just kept saying "we go on more rides mama? more rides? more boat? more train? more taxi car?"

True lies of a crazy mom

Today (really this was written a month ago and I forgot to post it. You will be happy to know that sweet Ben has since returned to us and his evil twin....has not been seen in weeks), I did not do any of the following (in case the nomiations for mom of the year are due in soon):

Pretend to be asleep at 3:45 am when Ben was coughing so Greg would get up and go check on him. To which Ben responded "I want my pacificer." You know....the love of his life that we took away from him three weeks ago and his repaying us every waking moment of the day and sometimes night for? Yes, that one. Greg ignored the question. I am so proud. (I threw them all away anyhow.)

Beg Ben to watch a second episode of Sesame Street so I could lay on the couch a little longer and try to get some sleep. And pour him a second bowl of cereal to seal the deal.

Allow my son to eat donut holes for second breakfast.

Spank him in Nordstroms and tell him he's lost privileges" (while being totally vague knowing he has no idea what "privileges" are) for pulling dozens of ties, socks, shirts, etc off shelves while I was CHASING him around the store. While Greg was happily trying on a beautiful pair of 100% wool, lined, classic flat front slacks that were going to be custom tailored to fit perfectly. (I think I need a job that requires I don't buy my clothes at Target).

Pay some guy to make a "Monkey Climbing Up a Tree to Get Bananas" balloon animal at Ruby's to entertain him for 5 minutes while we waited for our food. I would have paid him $100, but thank goodness I only had a $5.

Allow my son to eat french fries and cheese for dinner.

Pay $1 to let my cranky disobedient son ride the carousel to again provide a 5 minute glimpse of the pre-two year old tantrum throwing, emotionally unstable, occasionally angry child that use to be my sweet Ben. And he was. "Mama....I ride horse! Giddy up. Giddy up!"

I think I should write a book titled, "I Will Give You Whatever You Want As Long As You Stop Whining." Would you buy it?

April 20, 2009

this is why i have always been afraid to be a writer....

WRITERS BLOCK! Seriously...still nothing noteworthy to blog about. Or lacking a brain power to retain good ideas to blog about. Probably the latter.

I have writers block and potty training block! Don't know where to start. Afraid to start. Want to start...before my unborn, unnamed baby boy is born in approximately 8 weeks. For those counting, yes, I'm rounding down hoping with all my heart that he makes a little bit of an early appearance like Ben did.

So back to potty training. I think Ben is more interested and committed than I am. He's totally into his Potty Book. His big boy underwear and asks to sit on the potty every time we walk into the bathroom. And I usually tell him, we'll sit on the potty later. Let's just get in the tub, wash hands, etc. B/c I'm generally lacking the patience to sit on the floor of the bathroom for hours on end waiting for the blessed tinkle. Maybe if we do this in our bathroom and I bring some sort of really comfy chair for me to sit on also? Or a mini fridge? And a TV?

I've heard it's easiest to potty train in the summer b/c it warm out side and there's lots of opportunity for naked play time in the back yard. Well.....it's flat out HOT outside this week. And Ben has the starts of a little cold so we are on social event probation....so maybe I should just GO FOR IT!?!?!?!? I'll talk to Ben and see what he thinks.

UPDATE - 5 minutes later. I put Ben on the potty and left the bathroom (I'm sure that's a no no but honestly I have not read any of the potty training books to know) to go get the perfect comfy chair, load of books and reward snack in case there was a tea spoon of pee in the toilet......and when I returned, Ben declares. I have a dirty diaper. That's right.....he pooped in the potty! Maybe he just needed privacy?

April 4, 2009

nothing.....

i have nothing to write about these days. or just haven't felt inspired. maybe i'm officially back in the sleepy / lazy / pregnant zone? and lost my funny bone?

some not so interesting thoughts: i have started saying "the boys" when referring to my "children" a lot. like..."the boys" will likely destroy that, or "the boys" will have so much fun pulling that off the shelf and breaking it, etc. i think i'm just preparing myself.

and greg and i had a date night / date day this weekend as ben spent the night at my aunt and gramma dorie's house. we enjoyed a few good meals out, miscelanous shopping and strolling around town. it felt like before we had ben. out running errands. talking about baby names. me listing things i wanted done to the house before the baby comes :) but after 24 hours, i miss him like crazy and am going to reclaim my son!