parks and play dates (or police and peepee)

sometimes my days as a domestic engineer / childcare director (as I like to think of myself) are full of parks, play dates, pancakes and picnics.

today was not one of those days.

ben is retaliating against me for several reasons. but most noteworthy, taking him on two, week long, long distance, travel excursions full of sugar, sleep deprivation, and unreasonable performance (being the perfect child 18 hours a day) expectations. and for making him go to bed at 6:59 last night because i was exhausted.

so today he has demonstrated his will to disobey. over and over and over again. which makes my head (and my heart) hurt.

along with that, there have been several other, unrelated incidences that have me spinning. and not in spandex on a stationary bike at the gym where i would like to be.

i took ben to school at 9. found a buyer for my old car at 10. day off to a good start! i was 15 minutes early to pick ben up from school so i went in and found him eating his lunch. i joined he and his classmates sitting on miniature blue chairs. the lunch time conversation was priceless. 10 minutes into lunch (which was 5 minutes after i wanted to leave), i hear someone holler "lock down! lock all the doors." there was a furry of activity. teachers coming and going. checking on kids, etc. mean while ben is continuing to spread hummus all over the table as a two year old should. i look out the window and see several police cars. yellow tape being strung around the house next door to the school. a man running into the street. i was nervous for a second, but did not break into a full force mom protecting my children panic. the lock down lasted 30 minutes, during which time i was able to piece together a bed ridden lady lives next door, in distress, man arrested, crime scene investigation began....wow. i tried to pretend i was totally engaged in the train track i was helping ben build, while listening to the teachers and moms talk. apparently ben was really really engaged in the train track, because when we were finally cleared to leave the building through one secure exit, ben proceeded to throw a total crying, screaming, meltdown coniptionfit. in front of this teacher. and the other moms. awesome. so i'm trying to finagle lyle in the car seat, ben on my hip, a lunch box, a bag of wet clothes (did i forget to mention that ben had a potty accident and was wearing borrowed school clothes at this time?) and a handful of 2-1/2 year old crafts from the day. and i had to parade myself and my out of control child through three other class rooms to get out through the secure exit? awesome.

but before leaving the class room, ben sure did grab a plastic coke / root beer bottle and say...in his LOUDEST VOICE..."mom, here is your BEER." to which i obviously replied, "you mean my root beer" and he repeats, "no...here is your BEER." awesome.

we drive home and ben enters into full on nap strike. he just cried and ran around his room and ran from me...for an hour (while I was reassembling the crib tent that was unfortunately taken down two weeks ago) and undoing all the big boy bed progress we'd made the last week.

and then he peed in his crib during nap time.

i'm exhausted and going to bed. after i finish my beer.